Attempted hoovering?

Slept well, woke up early, felt a need to find a me-specific message in the Bible, read a bit, found it, feeling strong today.

So, 8 days after I escaped, and 1 day after my birthday, I got this message from Narc.  He has never celebrated Christmas with me, much less even remembered my birthday.  The last gift I got was about 4 years ago (perfume that his mother wears) and a card that wasn’t even taken out the plastic wrapping, never mind with a message inside.  He gave these to me in the morning, and then disappeared into his workshop all day to drink alone and probably speak to other people on his precious phone, which is attached to his hip like a permanent fixture.

So, after ignoring his calls (about 3 or 4 of them), this is the message I got (interesting to note “STILL help you with your credit card – ja right!)

Narc sms 28 dec 2015

I am grateful to be in a place of safety and strength, with the knowledge to understand that this is NOT REAL.  He was probably just bored.  He hates to be alone.  If he decides to honour the debt, ie damages he has left me with, then great.  If not, I am happy to walk away from it.  I will certainly not mention this again to him, never mind answer his pathetic calls.

Me?  I’m happy to be “alone”….away from this kind of manipulation.  I am not under any false impression that my new journey will be easy, but I am 100% certain that it has begun, and will continue day by day.

Fare thee well, 2015.  Bring on the new.



7 thoughts on “Attempted hoovering?

  1. Most definitely a hoover!! I have read your previous posts describing his behaviours while you were in the relationship. And those were not very nice behaviours at all, and now look at him, being so very nice and friendly! My narcissistic ex did this all the time! Pretending to be the nice guy, so very nice and kind, etc. I started to doubt if he was really “that bad”, went back a hundred times to make sure, lol. I regretted going back each and every single time, cause he treated me worse than ever when I went back. A million new lies, etc. Stay strong! (Change your phone number if at all possible.) Hugs! 💜 Happy New Year!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Thanks for noticing… isolation, these messages DO look nice and friendly, caring….. Sigh…..what can you do? He’s a chop. No two ways about that, and now that I KNOW it, well, there’s just no turning back time. Thank you for all your support….I wish you a peaceful and safe new year.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I know this feeling you are talking about, being alone and feeling lonely is a huge risk factor when it comes to falling for hoovers. I say these things only out of concern, please try to stay No Contact, the narcissists can be so extremely manipulative, so we normal people usually do not stand a chance when they start to up the ante with the nice guy act… that right there is exactly how my narc would start..later on came promises to change, begging, etc etc. It can become a horrible emotional pressure… try to reach out to any friends/family so you don’t feel isolated. Start new hobbies. Anything to keep from contacting him. I am with you. I support you. To our new life in 2016! 🎉🎆

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Yeah, it’s the typical bullshit from a narc. My narc did this all the time, push you away, pull you back. They hate to lose the attention, they hate to be obligated to give you any. It’s so nice to be away from that. And I didn’t even live with mine, thankfully. My ex-husband, who I left 9 years ago….well he wasn’t so narcissistic as sociopathic, controlling, with a violent temper. I was just relieved when I left him. I never had a moment of regret or sorrow over it, I think I did all that grieving before I left him. I was just so happy to only have to deal with things like being broke, lol, and keeping my car running, and not having to wrap my head around keeping him at bay. Big hugs, hope you have a wonderful new year!!!

    Liked by 1 person

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